he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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