if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
