its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Randomize
