Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
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