let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
