eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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