I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
