I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
