New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
