Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
So vagazzling was a success
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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