ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
