windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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