just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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