So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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