SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
