Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
her vagine was all disorganized.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
