I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
