Where is the hickey?
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
So I just went to clothing optional bar
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize