i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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