awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Randomize
