I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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