can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize