I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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