Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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