I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
