Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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