There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
