well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
