Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
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