When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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