Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
