Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
