got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
