I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
