do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
