I want you more than these girls want KFC
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize