My first STD was from a foam party
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
