I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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