I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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