i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I'm determined to sit on that face.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
