You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
