Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
