He is such a slut. More and more my type.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
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