at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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