we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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