Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize