Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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