What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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