Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
