In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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