i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
