i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
